Let's talk about sex.

One of the best places to talk about sex is...at church?

If you're a teenager or young adult that has had to learn about sex from movies, magazines, and the media - I'm sorry.

If you're a pastor or parent - this article is for you.

For 10 years, my wife and I led a youth ministry in the Seattle area. Every year, at least once a year, we had an open and honest talk with our youth ministry about God's design for sex. The reality is that our culture is saturated with sexual content. Christian youth will learn about sex. They will either learn about sex from their parents and churches, or they will learn about sex from the culture. Your kids learning about sex from culture can't be avoided. Your kids learning about sex from you shouldn't be avoided.

Your kids know about sex.

“Christian youth will learn about sex. They will either learn about sex from their parents and churches, or they will learn about sex from the culture. Your kids learning about sex from culture can't be avoided. Your kids learning about sex from you shouldn't be avoided.

Sexual content is everywhere. A simple Google search will reveal that the average person encounters nearly 10,000 advertisements per day. And sex is in advertising. Everything from burgers to shampoo are marketed to be sexually appealing. Teenagers are exposed to this content every day. And this is just the content that they see inadvertently.

Sexual content is in marketing, in movies and books, all over social social media, sex is even talked about in schools: amongst students and as part of the curriculum. Your teenagers know about sex. As a pastor or parent, it is your responsibility to ensure that the kids you've been entrusted with grow up having a solid, biblical view of sex.

Your kids have questions.

Every year, when we had "the talk" in a youth ministry setting, whether that was a "Purity Conference" or "Relationships Talk", we would always incorporate a Q&A session. On some occasions, we would receive hundreds of questions from our students. The questions ranged from "Can we kiss on our first date?" to "What is God's view on birth control?" One thing was clear, our students were desperate for answers. Yours are too.

Parents: Recent studies have shown that children are most receptive to their parents between the ages of 12-15. They have questions - give them answers. Don't make it super formal, don't make them feel like they're in trouble, but be intentional about having this conversation. If you don't, they'll get misinformation from the media and their peers.

Pastors: Plan an event, class, or service where you'll talk to the teens in your church about sex, dating, and relationships. Step one: set a time to meet with the parents of the teenagers in your church. When you meet with these parents, get their input. Discuss ideas, figure out what type of content should be presented at the teens event, and hear the parents' thoughts and concerns. Include them in them process. You will be grateful you did.

The Bible talks about sex.

“Scripture is able to engage all of the issues facing youth today.”

One of the most incredible things about the Bible is how open and honest it is. Jesus was unashamed in tackling the controversial topics of his day. Apostle Paul wrestled with issues that others might have been tempted to shy away from.

Talking about sex makes us uncomfortable - because our culture has perverted sex. But God created sex, to be enjoyed within the context of a healthy marriage between a man and a woman. This image of sex has been poisoned by a broken world. As a pastor, or as a parent, it is your responsibility to redeem the conversation about sex with your kids. Tell them what sex is, from a biblical perspective.

Get Inspired

Plan your next event. Get the students in your church excited about an evening devoted to dating and relationships. Incorporate a biblically-centered discussion on sexuality. Do some research - especially if this is your first time delivering a message about sex. If you need help, reach out to us.

#relationships #sex #dating